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It's A Joke

Started by dapleb , Mar 04 2022 07:21 pm

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#281 dapleb

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Posted 28 September 2022 - 06:59 pm

A weasel walks into a bar.

The barman says "wow I've never served a weasel before, what can I get you?".

"Pop" goes the weasel.
"Whats up", "Piston Broke", "Yeah me too...hic"

If you want to mark your location on the Carpe map: http://www.carpe-tdm...opic.php?t=5117

Doin valve clearances? Use dappers valve shim exchange program and the job will be carroty - Free (other than you postin me yer shims) for sporting members.

Active member of TPLQHCSRSFC and TSRMCMAS (even though a year off) and avid fan of PM not sent.

#282 waynedear

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Posted 02 October 2022 - 11:51 am

😁

 

Attached Files


#283 waynedear

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Posted 02 October 2022 - 12:05 pm

Son: Dad do you remember your first blowjob? Dad: Ohhh yeah I do! Son: How did it taste?


#284 dapleb

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Posted 07 October 2022 - 01:50 pm

To the man in the wheelchair that stole my camouflage jacket.

You can hide but you can't run!
"Whats up", "Piston Broke", "Yeah me too...hic"

If you want to mark your location on the Carpe map: http://www.carpe-tdm...opic.php?t=5117

Doin valve clearances? Use dappers valve shim exchange program and the job will be carroty - Free (other than you postin me yer shims) for sporting members.

Active member of TPLQHCSRSFC and TSRMCMAS (even though a year off) and avid fan of PM not sent.

#285 dapleb

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Posted 08 October 2022 - 08:01 am

What's the hardest thing about being a cross eyed teacher?

Controlling your pupils.
"Whats up", "Piston Broke", "Yeah me too...hic"

If you want to mark your location on the Carpe map: http://www.carpe-tdm...opic.php?t=5117

Doin valve clearances? Use dappers valve shim exchange program and the job will be carroty - Free (other than you postin me yer shims) for sporting members.

Active member of TPLQHCSRSFC and TSRMCMAS (even though a year off) and avid fan of PM not sent.

#286 dapleb

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Posted 12 October 2022 - 06:14 pm

The CEO of IKEA has just been appointed as the prime minister of Sweden.

He's currently assembling his cabinet.
"Whats up", "Piston Broke", "Yeah me too...hic"

If you want to mark your location on the Carpe map: http://www.carpe-tdm...opic.php?t=5117

Doin valve clearances? Use dappers valve shim exchange program and the job will be carroty - Free (other than you postin me yer shims) for sporting members.

Active member of TPLQHCSRSFC and TSRMCMAS (even though a year off) and avid fan of PM not sent.

#287 dapleb

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Posted 13 October 2022 - 05:55 am

I've just deleted all the German names off my second hand iPhone.

It's Hans free now.
"Whats up", "Piston Broke", "Yeah me too...hic"

If you want to mark your location on the Carpe map: http://www.carpe-tdm...opic.php?t=5117

Doin valve clearances? Use dappers valve shim exchange program and the job will be carroty - Free (other than you postin me yer shims) for sporting members.

Active member of TPLQHCSRSFC and TSRMCMAS (even though a year off) and avid fan of PM not sent.

#288 dapleb

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Posted 15 October 2022 - 09:06 am

What do you call sweaty boobs?

Humidititties.
"Whats up", "Piston Broke", "Yeah me too...hic"

If you want to mark your location on the Carpe map: http://www.carpe-tdm...opic.php?t=5117

Doin valve clearances? Use dappers valve shim exchange program and the job will be carroty - Free (other than you postin me yer shims) for sporting members.

Active member of TPLQHCSRSFC and TSRMCMAS (even though a year off) and avid fan of PM not sent.

#289 Snowbird

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Posted 20 October 2022 - 05:42 pm

Attached File  airbb.jpeg   89.98KB   0 downloads


Current toys: '99 XT600E, 2000 4TX, '82 Princess 30DS (where the username comes from), No longer a '03 Fazer thou.

Save the planet, it's the only one with beer!

#290 dapleb

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Posted 21 October 2022 - 09:37 pm

Went for a job interview at IKEA today.

The manager said "come in, make a seat".
"Whats up", "Piston Broke", "Yeah me too...hic"

If you want to mark your location on the Carpe map: http://www.carpe-tdm...opic.php?t=5117

Doin valve clearances? Use dappers valve shim exchange program and the job will be carroty - Free (other than you postin me yer shims) for sporting members.

Active member of TPLQHCSRSFC and TSRMCMAS (even though a year off) and avid fan of PM not sent.

#291 dapleb

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Posted 23 October 2022 - 10:19 am

I for one like Roman numerals.


************
I can't remember how to write 1,1000, 51, 6 and 500 in Roman numerals.

IM LIVID
"Whats up", "Piston Broke", "Yeah me too...hic"

If you want to mark your location on the Carpe map: http://www.carpe-tdm...opic.php?t=5117

Doin valve clearances? Use dappers valve shim exchange program and the job will be carroty - Free (other than you postin me yer shims) for sporting members.

Active member of TPLQHCSRSFC and TSRMCMAS (even though a year off) and avid fan of PM not sent.

#292 harvey krumpet

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Posted 29 October 2022 - 07:56 am

I for one like Roman numerals.


************
I can't remember how to write 1,1000, 51, 6 and 500 in Roman numerals.

IM LIVID

I was going to post something a bit crass and opened the thread to read this.

 

A'll post it tomorrow.


Edited by harvey krumpet, 29 October 2022 - 07:58 am.

TDM 850 Loud and unusual. CRM 250r Woo hoo! DT 230 Lanza Fiddled with.... Bloody hell, is that legal? GG Randonee AKA "I didn't think that was possible".

#293 dapleb

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Posted 30 October 2022 - 06:47 am

What's the difference between black eyed peas and chick peas?

Black eyes peas can sing us a song.
Chick peas can hummus one
"Whats up", "Piston Broke", "Yeah me too...hic"

If you want to mark your location on the Carpe map: http://www.carpe-tdm...opic.php?t=5117

Doin valve clearances? Use dappers valve shim exchange program and the job will be carroty - Free (other than you postin me yer shims) for sporting members.

Active member of TPLQHCSRSFC and TSRMCMAS (even though a year off) and avid fan of PM not sent.

#294 madmopedracer

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Posted 30 October 2022 - 03:51 pm

Now that the clocks have gone back, I’ve put up a marquee in my garden with flashing lights and funky music.

 

 

Is this the winter of my disco tent?


#295 Favs

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Posted 31 October 2022 - 09:45 pm

I went for a job at the abacus factory, but I found it counterproductive.


Is it still t-shirt weather???

Edited by Favs, 01 November 2022 - 02:09 pm.

Single-handedly reviving the Wave.

 

2008 reg. Black TDM 900 ABS

 

 

 

#296 dapleb

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Posted 01 November 2022 - 06:32 am

Why would a pig dressed in black never get bullied?

Because batman has sworn to protect goth ham.
"Whats up", "Piston Broke", "Yeah me too...hic"

If you want to mark your location on the Carpe map: http://www.carpe-tdm...opic.php?t=5117

Doin valve clearances? Use dappers valve shim exchange program and the job will be carroty - Free (other than you postin me yer shims) for sporting members.

Active member of TPLQHCSRSFC and TSRMCMAS (even though a year off) and avid fan of PM not sent.

#297 Snowbird

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Posted 01 November 2022 - 11:44 am

Didn't get any trick or treaters visit last night despite putting out a pumpkin.

Attached File  pumpkin.jpg   23.16KB   0 downloads


Current toys: '99 XT600E, 2000 4TX, '82 Princess 30DS (where the username comes from), No longer a '03 Fazer thou.

Save the planet, it's the only one with beer!

#298 harvey krumpet

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Posted 03 November 2022 - 08:15 pm

I just told my girlfriend she had painted her eyebrows on too high.

 

She looked surprised..


TDM 850 Loud and unusual. CRM 250r Woo hoo! DT 230 Lanza Fiddled with.... Bloody hell, is that legal? GG Randonee AKA "I didn't think that was possible".

#299 dapleb

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Posted 03 November 2022 - 08:26 pm

I was on a diabetes awareness website and it asked me if i accept cookies...... Is this a truck question?
"Whats up", "Piston Broke", "Yeah me too...hic"

If you want to mark your location on the Carpe map: http://www.carpe-tdm...opic.php?t=5117

Doin valve clearances? Use dappers valve shim exchange program and the job will be carroty - Free (other than you postin me yer shims) for sporting members.

Active member of TPLQHCSRSFC and TSRMCMAS (even though a year off) and avid fan of PM not sent.

#300 dapleb

dapleb

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Posted 05 November 2022 - 07:20 am

Did you hear about the optician who made the biggest pair of glasses in the world?

It was a huge spectacle.
"Whats up", "Piston Broke", "Yeah me too...hic"

If you want to mark your location on the Carpe map: http://www.carpe-tdm...opic.php?t=5117

Doin valve clearances? Use dappers valve shim exchange program and the job will be carroty - Free (other than you postin me yer shims) for sporting members.

Active member of TPLQHCSRSFC and TSRMCMAS (even though a year off) and avid fan of PM not sent.
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