19 replies to this topic

[dapleb]

Every treader is an adventure.  On todays pootle I felt the sudden need for fuel in the form of oice cream.  Managed to find a shop eventually but only packs of three ice creams. ..what can ya do. 

 

So I left shop and treadered out of town for a sit doon on a bench and some oice cream.  I passed a blind couple (on foot I should add) on the way ooot and then they repassed me as I sat eating ice cream.  I asked em if they would do us a flavour and scoff an oice cream each wid me to stop em meltin in me pocket...so I sat on a bench in the middle of two blind peeps and their harnessed/fluorescent dawgs, all three of us wearin shades and scoffin oice cream and nattering aboot all sorts of jibber jabber,     Part of the deal was that if they helped me ooot with the oice cream oi would help them ooot with the dawg turd they had been carrying for several miles...so after our jibber jabber off oi treadered with a turd swingin from me handlebars.....chucklin to me'sen loike a madman,

[Pantboy]

  a very random story there dappers, love it, how long did you have to carry the turd

[muddy]

Ice cream for dog richards. You deserve a red nose and a Blue Peter badge there Dappety.

[Gdogg]

Dappers that's the best little story I've heard in ages , brilliant  

 

You've made my day, top fella  

[dapleb]

I had a bit of a di-lemur Pants either cycle back oop the way I came (grrt big hill) where there would def be turdbin or leaf it to swing on handlebars slappin me knee for at least 15miles of nothingness......so I went back from whenst I came, logged off and then treadered back.

 

I learnt some fascinating facts abooot guide dogs.  They are already trained and start work at 18months old!  They have a failsafe "back to base" option if you get lost.  Some of them are clever enough not only to detect obstacles at ground level but will also refuse to go past human head height obstacles loike scaffolding and finally they love to lick the last bit off yer lolly stick (yes that does sound wrong) but only if ya ignore the "please donut feed" sign on the harness.

[Favs]

Brilliant

[Studley Ramrod]

 

I reckon they seen you comin' chief. Or perhaps not.   Anyhoos, twas a grand jesture you made there.

[dandywarhol]

When I was racing I'd a sphincter loosening reaction to Castrol R oil. Even the smell in my garage when working on the bike during the week would command the reaction so occasionally I'd to turd into a plastic bag - handles are handy when aiming. I'd then to transport said turd to a nearby litter bin - I'd always amazed how much a turd weighs.

[wicklamulla]

rotflmao at Eccles and PK.

[chrisr]

I genuinely have a practical question about this story, but don't want to appear fa(e)cetious.

[palexxxx]

I don't believe that this antidote actually happened.  Everyone knows that there's not enough BTU's in the English sun to do any serious damage to your ice-creams (whether they be in your pocket or not).  I reckon you rode home and then scoffed the lot.  

Edited by palexxxx, 14 April 2014 - 12:46 am.

[Nanook]

When I was racing I'd a sphincter loosening reaction to Castrol R oil. Even the smell in my garage when working on the bike during the week would command the reaction so occasionally I'd to turd into a plastic bag - handles are handy when aiming. I'd then to transport said turd to a nearby litter bin - I'd always amazed how much a turd weighs.

Too much info Alan old bean!

[Studley Ramrod]

I don't believe that this antidote actually happened.  Everyone knows that there's not enough BTU's in the English sun to do any serious damage to your ice-creams (whether they be in your pocket or not).  I reckon you rode home and then scoffed the lot.  

 

Mighta been the heat from the turd bag ?

[leehenty]

well done dappers, them dogs saw there was a free ice cream in it for them.

[BSM]

Only a janner could have a oice cream in one 'and an a dog turd in tother. Believe me, I know. Kelpie has a Great Dane!

Edited by BSM, 14 April 2014 - 06:11 pm.

[harvey krumpet]

Glad I finally plucked up the courage to open this thread. Lovely tail on so many levels.

I do feel like a whine, though. I'm an ardent canine fan since way back & the situation gave me paws for thought. 

If ever you should ride past said couple & guides again there is a very good chance you will be recognised as Mister Whippy by the Labs. Inevitably the dogs will set off in hot pursuit of the chilly, creamy contents of your pocket with the poor unsighted people at the mercy of traffic & roadside furniture as they sprint behind screaming "back Shep, get back, down Shep", bagged turds swinging merrily from there wrists.

 

Which brings me to the next thing. If they are blind, how did they find & bag the turds? Did you shake hands? Give them a high five? Dispose of their sticks, too?

 

Chalk mixed with olive oil is effective in getting rid of worms.

[Kelpie]

       

[chrisr]

How they got it bagged was my question!

[leehenty]

Feel and smell ? maybe the dogs are highly trained and poop in the bag for them 

[dapleb]

That too was one of me amusements and wonderments!  I am guessin its wan of them things what you learn from experience...and FAST.

 

I also remember the Weewan tellin me his Castrol / log-in-a-bag story before.    Not such a wee tolly then weewan!!